Friday, April 22, 2011

Another Chance

So I'm back from the hospital and just awaiting recovery to face my final session of chemotherapy. This last cycle wasn't as rough as I imagined it could be but the long term side effects and scars are starting to become more apparent. Small prices to pay for a possible cure.
Anyway, I had to share my excitement about this trailer for what looks like could be a really powerful movie.

As always, most interested in stories about second chances, redemption and people facing incredible circumstances; I'm pretty pumped about Another Earth. Some would say I fit the bill of one of these people, taking a step away I might agree, and on a perhaps less egotistical level I would also say that my life is no different from anyone else's and no can really imagine the pain that goes on behind closed doors even though mine might be a little bit harder to disguise.

Pretty soon I might have gotten my second chance. Time will tell if I do, the cancer could come back soon and I could have less than a year to live or it could come back never and I might live till old and gray. I suppose I should get used to the ambiguity.

Faced once again with the possibility of leading a healthy life and getting a second go of it as I face my 30th birthday more questions arise than answers.

I have found a new meaning in life and a reawakening perhaps of what's really important and valuable...but now that I know that...what comes next? What do I really want to make of my life? How do I want it to be? How I can get there, as I face a potential new chapter of adulthood?

Questions I suppose will be answered on a day to day. There is no use worrying about what hasn't happened yet. Right now I can only learn to forgive myself for irreparable mistakes made only against myself and just let go. Time will tell and I hope to be given the chance not to fuck it up.

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