Sunday, February 20, 2011

The Effects of Cancer and Chemo

The battle rages on, so close and yet so far to a potential end. Sometimes I feel like I can see the other side. It’s warm and the rays of the sun are poking through what has until now been the grayest of skies.

Right now, gray is fine, it suits my current mood. Sudden weather changes equal sudden mood swings. An effect of my own personal planet’s global warming.

Not a molecule has been untouched. Every cell has been layed to waste, only to struggle and rebuild itself just to go through the same process over and over again. No time for a sigh of relief.

A planet fighting to survive.

Fields of hair have been dried out, the landscape of the skin has been charred, burnt and cracked leaving exposed scars of a war still being fought. Underneath the soil, intravenous currents boil and bubble in a chemical reaction to the poison that they are constantly being fed.

The days and the months go by and the irony is that while the planet grows stronger, it becomes weaker.

Before, in the evenings, the moon would come out with an invitation to play in unison with it’s constellation of stars, staying up as late as the impending morning would allow. Those times are gone.

Night and day blur into one now, as the world spins out of control, trying to regain its balance on a different, unsteady axis.

Even time is different, no longer into blocks of 24 hours or 30 days, but divided in the space between earthquakes and volcanic eruptions.

It remains uncertain what will happen once the dust settles.

One thing is clear now, an innocence was lost and never regained. The world forever changed.

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